無與倫比的美麗

(Excuse myself in English, I feel a bit embarrassed to talk about this in my own language, because this has been frustrating me for the past two months. I’ve been seriously wondering if I easily bring out the worst in people since a few of them went crazy right in front of me, but you told me tonight that you think I actually just made them too comfortable to tell me ugly things. You pointed out that they are indeed the same type of people who put on the best faces in front of others but hide many dark secrets inside them. They care too much about how people see them, so they try so hard to behave, and then they wear themselves out. However my attitude makes them feel like they would never be judged, therefore they mistook me as the way to let out their messed up emotions, and thought that I would unconditionally support them, including their unthoughtful decisions and their awful tempers.  So here is the question… are they actually the same without me? Probably yes. Did I bring out the worst in them? … I hope not.)

但老實說,人生到今天為止,遇到喜歡騎到別人頭上來、任性、放肆、藉口堆成山的人,也不過就那幾個,屈指可數。謝謝你今天告訴我這些,我們是在學習而日漸進步沒錯,但我們不能因為他們就不再看見別人的好,不能因為他們就停止對別人好,我們可以練習慢慢收回一些,但不能放棄砍掉。如果因此放棄的話,我還真是因為他們虧大了,成了他們爛根性的代罪羔羊。

屢次我核心價值觀動搖時,是你托住我,屢次我懷疑自己是不是有問題時,是你解釋全盤圖畫給我看,還告訴我我很棒,而且要我堅持做自己,但我其實知道你才是那個很棒的人。「你形容我是這個世界上無與倫比的美麗,我知道其實你才是這世界上無與倫比的美麗。」

You have such a beautiful heart. We see hope in everyone and I promise I will always do the same. I will keep being who I am, because I get to meet wonderful people (such as you) only by being who I am.

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